THE AFTER BOOK EFFECT

No one warned me of the « what happens after...

Now that the book is out in the world and is no longer mine alone.

No longer just a quiet companion of sleepless nights and whispered thoughts.

I find myself standing in a strange ‘in-between’...

There’s a sense of relief and of gratitude, like a deep exhale after holding my breath for years.

A lightness.

The joy of having crossed a finish line I once thought might keep moving forever to be honest.

But it’s not only that.

There’s happiness, yes, so beautiful and sudden.

Of course, a quiet, stunned pride too, in knowing I followed something all the way through.

But also a kind of tremor beneath it: the feeling of having exposed something personal and real.

Like walking out into daylight still wrapped in dreams.

I’m moving now between so many different states like weather changes.

Curiosity bubbles up: how will it be received?
Will it be seen, understood, held with care?

Then: fear. The critics, the silence, the noise. The vulnerability of being read.

Like « buy but don’t read » ;)

There are flashes of ambition again screaming: “Volume 2, let’s go !!! »

But also the call of stillness, the deep yearning for a pause, for HOLIDAYS, for mornings without pressure and nights without the pull of unwritten pages.

No one quite warned me about this particular chaos, this wild mix of emotions that tumble in once the final word is out.

I had thought publication would bring clarity. Instead, it’s brought a kaleidoscope.

And perhaps that, too, is part of the journey: learning to stand in this unpredictable aftermath, not needing it to make sense just yet, only allowing it to be felt.

The book’s journey actually never finds an end.
‍

‍

‍